Wigan Wonderland

GS’s beloved Wigan finally got a win under their belts during his Real-Time FM stewardship with a Boxing Day victory over struggling QPR (who fired manager Mark Hughes in the aftermath), but not before shipping another three goals away, this time in defeat at Newcastle.

DEC 22: Newcastle United 3-0 Wigan Athletic

Livetweeting on twitter.com/realtimeFM:

WIGAN: (4-4-2) Al Habsi – Garcia, Ramis, Caldwell, Boyce – Beausejour, McCarthy, Watson, Klein – Guidetti, Boselli.

“Wigan have been poor of late and I can see this fizzling out into a bore draw,” says KiCK Magazine. 13th v. 6th at St James’ Park.

We’re underway at St James’ Park with both fielding a flat 4-4-2. Wigan manager GS has a full tub of Cadbury’s Roses and looks half-cut.

15′ Other than Caldwell firing a free-kick from 25 wide, nothing of note has happened. Possession 60-40 to the hosts, Wigan 5-2 up on shots.

28′ GS yawned as another attack broke down so went for a bottle of wine. Came back and found Newcastle 1-0 up. No idea. Penalty apparently.

28′ View from the Wigan dugout as they trail to Cabaye’s penalty:


41′ 2-0 NEWCASTLE. Ba doubles the lead after a solid 10 minutes of Wigan control. Tiote breaks down the right and crosses for a low finish.

HT Newcastle 2-0 Wigan. GS possibly going mad and debating going 3-4-3. Wigan final third play is woeful. Newcastle scored from two breaks.

HT’ He’s snapped. 3-4-3 with Watson making way for Jordi Gomez, and Di Santo going up from at the loss of left-back Garcia. ExperiMENTAL.

47′ Seventy-three seconds after the break, Coloccini goes through the back of Guidetti some 20 yrds out and gets the first booking of the day.

47′ Caldwell smacks the free-kick against the bar with Harper well-beaten.

51′ All three dice rolled for Wigan as Stam replaces Klein up the right.

63′ Guidetti hits the bar from 20 yards out as the front three of Wigan look a lot more dangerous. Wobbly on a counter though.

70′ Probably still 2-0, manager GS confesses to not looking as he’s been arguing with the Sellotape on his tin of Roses. Sticky fingers.

80′ Football is happening, but manager GS is debating substituting Caramel Velvet for Strawberry Dream in his mouth. Mmm chocolate.

89′ Newcastle finishing the match with a period of possession, four corners in a r-oh wait, 3-0. CISSE heads home from the corner.

FT Newcastle United 3-0 Wigan Athletic (Cabaye pen 26, Ba 41, Cissé 89).

Assistant Manager Graeme Jones sent to post-match press conference as GS attempts time travel to play Boxing Day match next.

Wigan manager GS held a meeting with the squad after slumping to their third successive defeat, winless in five.


DEC 26: Wigan Athletic 2-0 Queens Park Rangers

Livetweeting on twitter.com/realtimeFM:

GS is glutton for festive punishment. He’s refilled his glass* of wine and if playing his Boxing Day fixture next. (*bucket)

Wigan v. QPR: “I fancy QPR to win this one, they have a recent poor way record but Wigan have really been struggling of late.” 3-4-3 v 4-4-2

We’re underway at the DW with Arouna Koné back in the Wigan front three after his suspension. Wigan keeping the 3-4-3 from Newcastle game.

20′ Goalless at the DW, but GS can confirm he’s put a wash load on using the previously untried 40 degrees cottons setting.

28′ A Park Ji-Sung surge down the left ends with a cross caught by the wind, looping over Al-Habsi but hacked off the line by Beausejour.

34′ QPR forced into their second change of the game. Taarabt and Onuoha both off injured. Meanwhile, rockbottom Saints go 2-1 up at Chelsea.

43′ WIGAN 1-0. John GUIDETTI picks up a stray pass and strides forwards unopposed to slam home from 20 yards as the hosts take the lead.

53′ Boselli replaces Koné who doesn’t look good after being clattered on half-way.

63′ Ben Watson replaces Jordi Gomez for Wigan. It’s end-to-end stuff but nothing on target since the break.

72′ 2-0 WIGAN. Beausejour hits one from the edge of the area which Julio Cesar parries away, BOSELLI reacts first and slams home.

83′ QPR hit the crossbar. The foul-heavy Bosingwa and Park Ji-Sung link up well down the right, but Mbia’s header can’t sneak home.

FT Wigan Athletic 2-0 Queens Park Rangers (Guidetti 42, Boselli 71)

QPR have sacked Mark Hughes aft the defeat at Wigan. They sit 19th on 14pts, three from safety. Saints bottom with 10pts from 19 matches.

Arouna Koné assessed, broken ribs and faces a month out, jeopardising his African Cup of Nations place with Ivory Coast.

Here’s the current Premier League table:


(NB Includes points from Arsenal 2-2 Tottenham, an early kick-off on 29 December as I continued in error).

Merry Christmas everyone! GS x