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RTFM is 0% bulletproof and subject to normal gravity. Reading during a court case or a job interview may lead to a loss of employment or exoneration by 2%. Wireless. Not suitable for dogs. Suitable for mountaineering only when used in conjunction with a woolly hat, some comfortable shoes, and full safety gear. Do not use as a parachute unless all other options have been attempted. May cause drowsiness. Suitable for popes and bishops with accompanying headgear, sold separately, at other outlets. Can be consumed at mealtimes through try not to smear mayonnaise or ketchup over my beautiful website. As read by Duane Eddy in between studio takes for his 1962 album Twistin’ ‘n’ Twangin’. May cause your device to float on iron but sink in air. Suitable for all Latin Americans between the ages of 0 and 120. Will not resurrect the dead. No returns accepted.